ཐི༏ཋྀ ⨾… Butterfly was the home you stayed too long
from Sin-é
And sunflower the affair brief as a song ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
Rebecca: New York / city / mirror / lipstick / letter / blood / gun / silver eyes / bed / doorstep / couch / butterfly
“i dont want to lose you but i cant ask that you stay we all know that it means toture anyway” (I Know We Could Be So Happy Baby)
sometimes you say: im not really here – no ive never been here... were shadows in the fog. And even silence will disappear someday
and I know that you dont mean to come off so damn cruel
im trying to come clean but I feel so lost in this cloud of songs that you left me.
♫ Grace / Lover, You Should've Come Over / So Real / Forget Her / You & I / Gunshot Glitter
ཐི༏ཋྀ Silver Eyes (“Home Wreckordings”): https://tale.violaine.xyz/budd/silver-eyes
Liz: London / flower / gift / treasure = jewel / gold / star / light / woman = lady / steal = thieves / purity / shame / friend / fail
And though the meaning fits There's no relief in this (Morning Theft)
it's stupid all the words fit together where now is nothing why did you have to bring us together, under such dirty circumstance? (Let's Bomb the Moonlight)
Love, love is a verb Love is a doing word
Teardrop on the fire Fearless on my breath
Night, night of matter Black flowers blossom
Water is my eye Most faithful mirror
You're stumbling down
♫ Morning Theft / Vancouver / Jewel Box / Thousand Fold / Opened Once
🌻 “All Flowers” Terminology: https://tale.violaine.xyz/budd/sweet-willow
🌻 “All Flowers” Timeline: https://tale.violaine.xyz/budd/all-flowers-in-time
🌻 “All Flowers” Diary: https://tale.violaine.xyz/budd/sea-in-love-with-moon
🌻 “All Flowers” Diary: https://tale.violaine.xyz/sin-e/morning-theft
Passion (Love & Sex): nightmare / fire / burn / wave / bliss / floor / rain / moon / smile / fly / dance
spring water on the floor of this sex starved room the nightmare's fires burn the waves of bliss (Mood Swing Whiskey)
♫ Nightmares By The Sea 🔥
❤️
“He made you feel as if he understood you completely.” (Rebecca Moore)
“To meet Jeffrey was just like being given a set of paints...I had all this colour in my life again.” (Liz Fraser)
“Suddenly, I felt so happy. And that’s how it was with Jeff. Somehow he was that mirror, always reflecting back the love inside you.” (Brenda Kahn)
“When you get attention from someone like that, you feel like a queen.” (Joan Wasser)
💔
“im trying to come clean but I feel so lost in this cloud of songs that you left me.” (Rebecca)
“I'm just not penetrating this Jeff Buckley boy at all...felt like a groupie or something sometimes. I mean can you imagine? Everybody wanted something from him” (Liz)
“A state of perpetually feeling he was unloved...and it was awful to see that. It didn't matter how much you loved him or whether you fell in love with him or tried to love him.” (Merri)
“Good luck figuring him out.” (Joan)
Rebecca Moore
‘I really loved Jeff,’ she wrote. ‘He was pretty much my first really deep connection and friendship, and it was a revelation when we met. It taught me that there was happiness and support out there. He was so unbelievably funny; he had such a supreme grasp of the comic and the tragic. It was a surreal and magical few years in my life.’
‘I did the best I could, the absolute best – and I know he did too – to weather the intense and truly emotionally brutal world of the major label recording industry,’ Rebecca Moore wrote to me. ‘I don’t think people can possibly understand, unless they go through it, how dark that world can be; how much and how quickly it takes over and causes everything to change if you don’t have an impossibly calloused armadillo skin. Part of it is cliché, but part of it is so much more dark than anyone can imagine. Both of us were way too incredibly naive, innocent, green and ultra-sensitive to withstand it or navigate it, despite our best efforts, because the industry thrives on manipulation and control; it is truly about exploiting the artist’s vulnerability.’
A Pure Drop: The Life of Jeff Buckley
Brenda Kahn
“Just after Jeff died, I had an amazing dream..I dreamt I was in his apartment. It was dark and as my eyes adjusted I began to see all the ordinary things of life, of Jeff’s life, in the room..shirts hung over the back of a chair, books everywhere, some opened, some written on, papers on the bed, pictures on the walls..I walked through this room and into another smaller room. On a little dresser against the wall, there was an old-style child’s music box, the kind with a ballerina that turns around in front of a little mirror. I opened the box, and there was no ballerina, but instead in the mirror there was the word LOVE written in seventies bubble letters. After a moment i realized the word was backwards, as if I were LOVE being reflected in the mirror. Suddenly, I felt so happy. And that’s how it was with Jeff. Somehow he was that mirror, always reflecting back the love inside you…”
A Wished-For Song: A Portrait of Jeff Buckley
Merri Cyr
From my perspective, it seemed he felt desperately unloved. He would push love away and at the same time say, ‘Give it to me. Go away, then come back.’ What Jeff wanted and what he needed were two different things. On one level he had to control everybody; on another he didn’t respect you if you didn’t stand up to him and fight back when he bullied you.
“I don’t know about him with other people, but my relationship with him felt familial, though there was also a sexual aspect to it. We had similar backgrounds, lower middle class; neither of us knew our fathers. We had similar father abandonment, crazy mother issues, weird family stuff. Sex can be just two kids hanging out, fooling around; it wasn’t the main thing. It was like it had no context.
“I wanted to do my photography. Jeff was being respectful to me and very helpful and supportive, and that was the best gift he gave me. He was so generous on one level and so broken on another. On the road, I definitely got pulled into his orbit. That was really tough for me.
From Hallelujah to the Last Goodbye
Just like the ocean, always in love with the moon
It's overflowing now, inside you
